Penny Pinching Peach


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Weird Things Moms Say

Say What??

Say What??

Anyone else find the weirdest things coming out of your mouth when speaking to the crazy cute beings known as your children? I often pause after saying something to one of my children and think “Wow, that would sound completely crazy if someone wasn’t in this scenario to understand!”. I thought I’d share a few random quotes and the adult side of conversations from the mouth of this weird mommy, free of the context they were responding to. 😉

“Did you really just fill your teacup from the toilet?!? Don’t drink that! Give it to me!! Wash your hands! Because people poop where that water came from! Yes, yuck!”

“Peanut butter is not paint! I don’t care if it makes your room smell good!”

“You would scratch someone, too, if she picked you up by the tail and spun you in circles! No, I am not putting the cat in timeout! I’d put you there if he hadn’t scratched you already, though! I’m mean? Ummm…thanks!”

“Get your foot out of my hair!”

“You can’t fly. No, you can’t! Not even if you’re wearing a cape. Don’t climb up there. Stop! GET DOWN NOWWWW!!!”

Say What??

Say What??

“Don’t put your toes in your mouth. Because they are dirty, that’s why!”

“No, you can’t drive my van to the park! You’re five years old! I’m glad you watched Daddy drive lots of times, but that doesn’t mean you can drive yourself! I know you drive your power wheel, but that’s different.”

“The closet is not a toilet!!!”

“Daddy doesn’t make milk. Yes, I know he has nipples, but only mommies make milk. Yeah, it probably would taste funny with all that hair on them, anyway.”

“That’s sweet of you, but I really don’t want the biggest booger ever.”

This is just a small sample of the odd things I’ve heard come out of my own mouth in response to my children, if this gives you any hint into the tee-total lunacy of my household. Anyone else have some doozies you’ve caught yourself saying?

If you enjoyed this post, check out this one about my crazy kingdom of kiddos! https://pennypinchingpeach.com/2014/09/20/the-crazy-kingdom-of-kiddos/


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The Crazy Kingdom of Kiddos

Muddy Munchkin Man

Muddy Munchkin Man

I’m a stay at home mom, married to a firefighter paramedic who is literally gone over half the time just for work. I spend a lot of time alone in the crazy kingdom of kiddos….and it’s definitely a craaaaaaazzzzzzyyyyy place to be.

Want some examples? Happy to oblige! Maybe it’ll make someone else feel less alone in their own personal kingdom of kookiness. 🙂

Just the other day, my 4 year old decided that it would be a good idea to use a cooler and the counter to climb up and get the candy Mommy has safely stashed on top of the fridge to prevent the candy coma inducing binges she is so wonderfully prone to. My intervention was met with howls of indignation, instead of appreciation for the fact she didn’t break her stubborn little neck.

On the same aforementioned day, my potty training 2 year old came running up to me with a huge smile saying “Mama, me pee! Me pee!”. When I asked where, he proudly pointed under the kitchen table to the spreading yellow puddle. “Me pee!”. Yep, you pee… but don’t expect a treat for this one, baby boy!!

Some days my 4 year old doesn’t want to get dressed, because she thinks her jammies are the coolest outfits in the world. You know what? Sometimes I let her. Hey, a mommy gets tired! Ever heard the phrase “Choose your battles”? It seriously applies with small children of the strong willed variety. If I’m not doing a daggum thing other than puttering around the house, and the kid wants to wear her princess jammies all day, who am I to fight? I’ll fight when she wants to jump off the deck railing because it looks like fun or when she doesn’t want to brush her teeth because the toothpaste makes her milk taste funny, but wearing clean jammies all day now & then doesn’t hurt anything.

My munchkins were both playing happily with their water table recently as I watched out the kitchen window while doing the dishes. What I didn’t know was that the little stinkers had dumped a bunch of dirt into the table, and my little guy was smearing the resulting mud all over himself. By the time I did realize what they were doing, he was a pretty mess. In fact, the face in the photo came just before he started hollering “Bath!” and running for the house. You know a boy is filthy when he’s actually begging to be cleaned up! 😉

My 2 year old is all boy, no doubt about that. What he doesn’t yet know is that allowing your big sister to deck you out in her sparkly purple princess dress Disney Princess Sparkle Dress – Rapunzel 4-6Xand outgrown white Mary Jane shoes does not a macho man make. Gotta give the kid credit: He can almost make that get-up look masculine, as he struts around making superhero sound effects and rolls up the front of the dress to make it easier to charge around on his little red fire truck “saving the world” one stuffed animal at a time.

Yep, this kingdom of kiddos is completely crazy, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. 🙂 What craziness has happened at your house recently?
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